Murder Trial of Luis Aguirre: Thoughts After the Trial

Well here we are, all feeling traumatized, gently moving toward recovery.
 My students and I feel the mild trauma that is to be expected of normal empathetic humans.
The family of Luis Aguirre is surely traumatized: we watched them slowly break down over three days as the helplessness of their situation
 was superimposed on the recitation of their lifelong journey
of endurance of pain and thirst for love.

Those
Who loved the Ones who were Lost:
 the trauma of hearing, in parts for the first time, EXACTLY how the bodies of a girl and a baby were
  stripped of all that identified them and left
 in a pile of dirt...
How their spirits were
first tricked and then forced
from this planet, forced from their bodies, in what must seem too too soon.

[I know that what seems to be a thing may not be that thing.

I know that when one steps far enough back,

when one asks for the View of God, one may find that things are as they are meant to be in a world slouching toward bethlehem, slouching toward Gethsemene.]

If one could find
 That View, one might find peace and
let the air escape, realizing
one has not been breathing for a long time....

The lungs. Now a word of despair.

The trauma of a mother too sick to
Attend the most terrible Gathering Event;
The trauma of an Aunt wracked with memories, forcing in dreams a new path;
In Dreams rewriting the past;
Finding a Future blessed with blessings from an unseen height;
a warmed heart that seemed too broken to heal;
but the more deeply that sorrow carves into one's being the more joy one can contain
time

Time.
How long before the cliched words of comfort, the heartfelt wishes of only good memories remaining
come true?
So easy to talk;
nothing approaching the place of no words.
The
Journey to the Broken Heart
is a spiral of deepening
fear that one cannot bear the pain.
One approaches and withdraws.

It is not lack of courage but the knowledge that one must still live; there is work to be done. There is love to be given
and taken
One may not simply travel straight to the center of the spiral, leaving one's life behind, allowing the heart and soul to rend actually.
Perhaps a little further tomorrow.

All is well or will be.

I ponder the trauma of those who man the Courts:
Who gather the sad clues of truth hidden;
Who staff the perfect dotting of i's
That no one may challenge and walk away in a sneer,
Whose womanly arms encircle and keep those in pain grounded in knowing that even a stranger cares.
Those who must get up and prepare the materials that make angels and devils shudder-- every day they rise, every day they must be at their best to serve us.
Everyone is exhausted from the days of trial.
But these must rise again, and again. They must document every malignant detail--now in these days in perfection and magnified fashion--

 as

 the Whores of the Court have with no shame perverted Justice

to the end of money and fame and power.

The Daily Service of our public servants-
How do they do it?
and
How does a sister bear one more drop, one more tidal wave of pain and betrayal? and
How does one who trusted in most dulcet love ever trust again? and
How does a man layer upon his children a truth too terrible to teach them?
And when will all be known?

"For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open,

and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made
 known to all. Luke 8:17

There is nothing hidden that will not be revealed,

and there is nothing secret that will not become known

and come to light.

Oh, My life is my own. i have a grateful heart.

Music to cry with HERE Love Reign Over me

Day One of Capital Murder Trial of Luis Aguirre

for the Deaths of Tanya Maldonado

 and their son, Jaun Maldonado: Click HERE

Afterthoughts II: tomorrow i want to describe some impressions about how sociopaths prefer to be in the limelight; how receiving the death "penalty" actually serves to cost our courts a great deal of time and money as  we would have to continue to work through appeals, court appearances, puttin' on the suit, news releases, etc-- and for many many years or decades, plays right into the hands of that one for whom SelfPity is a comfortable place to be...as it is, after the sentencing on August 7,
We're through.