Sunday, January 1, 2012

Stalkers and Peepers Commit Murder and Rape: How Many Times I Gotta Tell Ya?

Update: on the TV news tonight, it was reported that Kawon Higgins
murdered Amanda Bonner, then killed himself.
It was also reported that he was the father of her two children. 
Two bodies found in Manhattan Kansas. One was a young woman who reported to police and her neighbors in fear regarding a man who was bothering her, peeping into her house. The story is reported in the Manhattan Mercury here.  Katherine Wartell writes,
"The Riley County Police were called to 715 Yuma Friday afternoon and discovered two bodies. Police called the deaths suspicious. The neighbor ...told The Mercury Saturday that there had been a history of harassment between the woman and a man whose body was discovered at the same time.  Authorities identified the deceased as Amanda Bonner, 23, of 715 Yuma Street, and Kawon Higgins, 26. The bodies were discovered Friday afternoon..." Apparently the woman called the police over a dozen times regarding this man.
The story went on to report that the young woman's tires had been slashed (as had those of her boyfriend) and that a restraining order had been placed against Higgins.
Amanda Bonner had two children.

In the Manhattan Mercury article, the neighbor of Amanda Bonner is quoted as saying, " A peeper doesn't stay a peeper. I've made complaints to everyone trying to get something done."
It reminded me
of an incident years ago where the K-State Collegian reported lightheartedly that a peeper was "flashing" his genitalia through KSU Hale Library window. He or someone matching his description had committed a crime against a student in Leasure Hall after hours within a day or two of the first "flashing".
The collegian reported it almost as a joke. He masturbated and flashed his genitalia, so it was funny, right? Except that when the young student trapped in the room with him tried to leave, he held the student down with the force of of his body. She had his blood and skin under her fingernails, her arm ended up in a sling, she feared death as she tried unsuccessfully to escape. But he was reported as a "flasher."

The FBI indicate that most serious violent crimes are committed by men who once committed lesser crimes like peeping, stalking, flashing, harrassing.
When will we take this type of violence seriously?

Last night there was a video on the Topeka evening TV news regarding an event about Ending the Violence. These events abound, and you may have participated in these events or at least listened to the reports for years, for scores of years, for generations now.
People gather with quilts, or t-shirts, or poems, or photos, and tell about the survivors-- or the dead, the lost, the heroes; at times they tell about people who were not listened to, people who were frustrated and filled with anger or grief or terror.
Riley County Domestic Violence Awareness Event HERE
Take Back the Night Tshirt Event click HERE

I've begun to feel that the good these events do is only for those involved;
i have diminishing hope that they serve an educational or preventative value that is significant. Those who are violent (Here and HERE) rarely change. It is good for those who suffer through the dealing with monsters to hear the stories of others, to know they are not alone.
It is good for their children to hear how they suffered for love of them; how much honor we owe them; how brave they were.
But things are not changing. How many times do violent men have to charm their way out of a jail sentence before we lock them up?

I just saw on the evening news about a Dallas Cowboy Football player (Jason Witten) who did a good thing, made a nice event for children who suffer from the cycle of relational violence. It was the next-to-last story--and at the end of the newscast everyone then put up their best "three words" on a card, like "treat everyone nice" and "live love laugh" and "hope is good" --and after it ended, with the newscaster all warm and fuzzy, the very next images flashed on the TV screen from the network were the jarring words, SEX - REVENGE - MURDER - etc. filling the screen; interspersed with scenes of almost naked bodies, blood, and evil grins.

It was an ad for the next show.

Lady Gaga Is Neither...
When we feed our children
deliberately  or with casual indifference
scenes of torture, death, rape, harrassment, and power
mixed with
sexuality, having friends and acceptance, and being cool,
we set them up.
We are setting up our children for failure and sadness.

More on the topic:

If they're gonna drink, at least do it in a safe place!
If they're gonna smoke at least make them smoke filters!
If they gonna make babies, click  HERE

Time to take a sick day...


  1. Great post. You brought up some important issues here.

    "The FBI indicates that most serious violent crimes are committed by men who once committed lesser crimes like peeping, stalking, flashing, harassing. When will we take this type of violence seriously?"
    Seriously. I remember there was a man who started out as a peeper during my college years. They never caught him (at least not while I was there) despite numerous complaints that increased in seriousness with each occasion. I don't know if they ever caught him, or perhaps he just moved on to a different neighborhood. I remembered students laughed about the "Toucher" as he became known, and it appeared that the cops continued to focus on catching underage drinking instead of this guy. These peepers and "Touchers" need to be taken seriously because it's true - it's only a matter of time before they do something really terrible. By ignoring them, we are only providing them with more courage to push the limits.

    You almost mentioned your diminishing hope in current preventative measures for sexual assault. I was wondering if you had any ideas for how to improve the current preventative efforts from you perspective as someone who works at a college.

    Thanks again for sharing your thoughts on these important issues.

  2. Thank you for that question. I am going to try to answer it this week. Oh, for two weeks on a desert island...