Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Topeka, Domestic Violence, and the Embarrassment of Relational and Political Bullying

Demeaned on yet another level: Our mothers, sisters, friends and children take another hit. Why are those who raise the national treasure not the first to be well-served? How can we allow the youngest humans to grow in an environment of brutish behavior, bullying, and injustice?
What can one say when once again, those most deserving of a community's assistance, protection, and justice
 are treated with such ___________.
 I got no wrds.

Wendy Murphy has words: "America’s shameful un-equal protection clause"  HERE
and HERE:   "Punishing abusers key to protecting women: ...
As many as 10 million children a year are exposed to domestic violence, causing them to suffer emotional and psychological harm, not to mention that they grow up believing that smacking your spouse is part of a “normal” relationship. No surprise then that boys who watch their fathers beat their mothers are far more likely as adults to do the same thing to their female partners.
    ...Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury for American women between ages 15 and 44.
Among homeless women and children, half are homeless because of domestic violence..."

Please watch the academy-award winning documentary, Defending Our Lives.
   "Domestic violence is the single greatest cause
of injury to women in America -
more than muggings, rapes, and car accidents combined.
A woman in the United States is more likely to be killed by her partner than by any other assailant..."
abc news story HERE regarding the politics in topeka.
Christian Science Monitor story "Why Topeka, Kan., repealed its ban on domestic violence" HERE

Domestic Violence Information: KSU Women's Center page HERE
Commemorating those
 who died: October Memorial HERE

The perpetrators: HERE

The fact is, those who batter their partners or their children are not given a consequence which deters them.

Wendy Murphy
writes, "...Even if education and cultural re-training might help some day, while we’re waiting around for our species to evolve, we need to give all endangered women a 45 caliber equalizer and we need to ramp up the punishment of batterers so that beating a woman isn’t sentenced on par with spitting on the sidewalk.
Anti-incarceration advocates will tell you that prison isn’t fun – and that it often spawns a toxic mental software that makes men who enter come out worse than ever when their sentence wraps up.
But if fear of becoming a monster in prison, and respect for women isn’t enough to deter a man from beating his wife, he’s already toxic – and putting him behind bars will prevent him from infecting innocent others with his poison. Punishment isn’t the only way to stop violence, but it is a legitimate and effective feature of our legal system. Lots of research shows how states that send a higher percentage of criminals to prison have lower rates of crime, even after controlling for all of things like poverty and urbanization.
But incarceration is a dirty word in the lexicon of some liberals who claim that locking people up gives the government dangerous amounts of power and threatens the freedom of the individual.
They’re wrong.
The freedom of FEMALE individuals is actually greatly enhanced when criminals who target women for violence are incapacitated.
But our legal system doesn’t care. And despite decades of disastrous statistics, our political leaders don’t care, either. In fact, nobody in a position of leadership is even complaining about the lack of justice for victimized women.
Earlier this month, there was a big to-do in D.C. about women’s issues in the Obama Administration. Lynn Rosenthal, whose responsibility it is to deal with violence against women on behalf of the president, gave a lovely talk about all sorts of things, but never once mentioned the profound failure of law to redress domestic violence or the desperate need for tougher punishments for batterers. Deval Patrick and his administration have been equally impotent.
Obviously, the men who promised “change” and “hope” for a better society, and who haven’t shied away from talking about the need for tough punishments for corporate criminals, have little “hope” to offer women in danger. They’re just two more politicians in a long line of others who value stuff more than women’s lives.
Wendy Murphy is a leading victims rights advocate and nationally recognized television legal analyst. She is an adjunct professor at New England Law in Boston. She can be reached at

Sadness. I know you may be tired of this issue, i certainly am. How long before we no longer tolerate this?!
It is to me a thing most curious, that within our species,
among our own families,
power, strength, should be used to hurt..
Relational violence is mind-bending,
as this Power to Hurt and Control others is used to temporarily take the edge off of feelings of inferiority.
What a loss;
how sad for us, that our culture has so many who will hurt those not only of their own species, but their very mates, their children....
Our own real stories and stats  HERE

While you SCREAM at your woman, there’s someone wishing to whisper softly in her ear… While you HUMILIATE, OFFEND and INSULT her, there’s someone wanting to please her and remind her how wonderful she is. While you HURT your woman, there’s someone wanting to love her. While you make your woman CRY there’s someone wanting to make her smile…

1 comment:

  1. The Topeka issue, in my mind, was not a question of finances - but priorities. I expect better from the state I live in. I heard about that and debated going down there and lobbying against it, and would have, if I would have known others going. I agree, it is a sad thing.

    And what is worse, to some degree we live in a culture it's accepted in. :-(